Nuts. Welcome to nutchat.I'm nuts4nuts. Not all nuts. And not nutz.
Cashews, they're the kings of the nut world. Almonds, peanuts, yeah they're pretty good too. Those Blue Diamond smoked salted almonds, they put up some mean game. Cashews be nervous! But cashews, man. Cashews always win. King Nut.
Peanuts understand the power of numbers. They just dominate the nut world through sheer volume. They're the zombie hoard of nuts. Eventually, you will succumb. You will ingest peanut. And you will either fucking like it or die.
On the other hand, why do people like macadamias so much? I found a brand-spanking-new-never-been-opened can in my cupboard last night and decided to bring them to the office because they need to be eaten. But about eight nuts in, I'm sitting here wondering why they're so goddam prized. They don't have a nice nut texture. Cashews and peanuts, nice texture. Water chestnuts, nice texture. These little monkey testicles? Un-fucking-pleasant. Nor do they have a good taste. It's like they're trying to be substantial, they want to be an elite nut, they tell people, "Hey, we're elite fucking nuts, you gotta pay to get us in your mouth!" But they're not elite. They're not worth it.Anyone want a mostly-full can of macadamias?
