Niners completely waste Brock and Jauan's almost perfect game

 

It's the sort of loss that makes me feel sick to my stomach. The previous week at Minnesota, where the Niners were competitive but ended up losing by six points, felt like an 'ah there's things to fix but they're plain to see and fixable' game.

This week against the Rams in contrast was a game where Purdy was missing three of his top four options on offense, where he would be forced to show up and show out in order to really truly shut up the naysayers (though of course not really, and definitely not once and for all - we could only hope).

And he did!! He played about as well as any QB this season. (Yes there was a strip sack but that was McKivitz, not Brock.) He was throwing to Jauan all over the yard, and holy god JJ had the game of his life - which is saying something because he should have been Superbowl MVP had the Niners won that one.

But they didn't win the Superbowl, and they didn't win this one either, and JJ - and Brock - will not get the recognition they deserve. What a waste, and what a shame. It's for them that the pit of despair exists in my guts today.

The reason for so many of the heartbreaking losses in the past, what, dozen or so years has been special teams. And special teams once again fucked us yesterday. And no, I don't even blame Moody (yes being drafted in the 3rd round raises expectations pretty damn high for a kicker, but his draft position isn't his fault). No one expects a 55 yarder to be automatic, that's not a reasonable expectation. But LA's successful fake punt and the final LA punt return were just not okay. Those are not winning plays, to say the least. Why can't we find a decent  special teams coordinator?? What is the origin of this curse?

The defense also should not be relinquishing that type of lead. Why does it keep happening to the Niners? Does this happen to other teams too? It boggles my mind, given the talent and the recent success that they've established as one of the standards in the NFL. New coordinator yes, and also yes I remember Demeco and Saleh both requiring time to get up to speed. But no, you should not be giving up a 10 point lead in the 4th quarter to end up losing by a last second field goal. Not to an admittedly pretty great QB, but with one with only ONE receiver.

I also have to say, Kyle, please stop with the Ronnie Bell. How many times does this guy have to break your heart? Put him on the practice squad if you want to keep him, but stop playing him in games. It's not working man, a receiver who can't catch does not work in the NFL.

Anyway, Brock and JJ, y'all balled absolutely tf out yesterday and I wish the rest of the team could have held on and won so your accomplishments could be properly recognized.

LA Times Article on NFL QBs by NFL QBs (by Sam Farmer)

Here is a really good article about NFL QB success, or failure.

It seems simple, quite comprehensible, and you'd think people with basic football knowledge - let alone coaches at the highest level, or team owners, or critics (some once NFL QBs themselves) - would get it. And yet so many don't. This list of 3.5 legendary NFL QBs (Jim Everett is only 0.5 legendary) plainly spell out why Sam Darnold, Baker Mayfield and Derek Carr are seeing career resurgences on new teams.

In conclusion: Carolina, you will remain busted as long as David Tepper is your owner.

Things that happened this weekend

The Culmination of the Year of Anna Sawai

I've watched a lot of Japan-based tv this year - Shogun, Tokyo Vice, Monarch (part-time-Japan), Pachinko (Japan-adjacent). Three of those four shows include Anna Sawaii in the cast. Last night, she - along with the rest of the Shogun cast, crew and creators - won a whole bunch of hardware at the Emmys. I'm not a real subscriber to award shows, but man alive I think this is just so well deserved. Shogun is a fantastic show, and Anna Sawai (and Hiroyuki Sanada) getting a whole bunch of accolades means the universe is working correctly.

I watched more Japanese-language tv than Chinese this year. Or, let's say tv series that contain Japanese or Chinese. Warrior's last season and the Brothers Sun were solid entertaining shows, but neither touched the depth of characters that maybe any of the four aforementioned shows do.

Oh I guess I also watched American Born Chinese, which did have a couple huge swing episodes to its credit. (The whole party in heaven episode was wild, I loved it.) And, should we count 3 Body Problem as Chinese adjacent? Considering its source material, if anything it had a lot of Chinese taken out of it.

Anyway. Congratulations, Anna Sawai. I thoroughly enjoyed the year of you.

Niners vs Vikings

The Niners lost to the Vikings this weekend, which normally would make me very sad but has actually only made me slightly sad. For one, this team needs to toughen up, for real. And Brian Flores' defense hopefully did some of that.

Defensively, Fred Warner is playing pretty much on god mode. I mean, he saved the game multiple times for the team, at least giving them the opportunity to win it. Which they did not, but still. I'm biased and I've watched way more Niners football than any other team, but Fred is my DPOY candidate after week 2.

On offense, Trent Williams made a couple mistakes that we are just not accustomed to seeing. BA is almost nowhere to be seen. And obviously CMC hasn't even played a down. So, there's some catch-up work to be done. These guys need to build up to game shape still.

As sort of meh as the team performed, I think the game was lost over a series of three plays. The 4th and goal where Kyle inexplicably called that screen and almost got Van Ginkle'd, especially after seeing the Giants and Daniel Jones suffer that exact fate the week before - I mean, what the hell was that. Then the Vikings take over on downs and two plays later, our safeties are showing us that we need way way better cover safeties out there. They are both torched by JJ, not to mention one of the refs apparently. I didn't see specifically but I'm assuming it was Brown and Odum. My god I hope Sorensen makes some adjustments and/or Huff returns asap. Also, you don't know what you got till it's gone but Gipson, our best cover safety, is most definitely gone.

The Brock fumble, not good. The blocked punt, not good. The muffed punt, very bad. The special teams pox continues in its, what, 12th year? 20th? I don't even know anymore.

But there are glaring things that can and hopefully will be cleaned up. Otherwise, as noted Fred Warner has the defense in relatively good shape and the offense put up good yards, they just couldn't finish. End result: only slightly sad.

Anna Sawai & Tom Hiddleston l Actors on Actors

Tom Hiddleston and Anna Sawai have a chat about Loki and Mariko and beyond. And by chat I mean a really thoughtful retro/introspection on each character, eloquently expressed, rich with consideration, from two wonderfully charming people.

I loved this and I love them.

Waking up with a stomach full of grief

 I had a dream this morning, the last one before I woke up, maybe around 6 am.

I dreamt that I flew to Europe to meet up with you. I was so happy to see you, it had been so long. You were happy, too.

We went to a market of sorts, an indoor market that you might be more likely to find in Asia. Maybe like the silk market in Beijing, but not as well lit.

You found a pair of jeans you liked, and asked me to buy them for you. I agreed, and when the guy rung them up at the register, the credit card machine said €1,534.41. I was shocked, and saddened that you weren't. I paid, because that's what you wanted.

We got into a little bit of an argument, and we had to walk away.

I came to find you, and you told me that you hated me. Two things happened simultaneously: the bottom dropped out of my stomach, and the hole was filled with dirty gravel.

I had to tell you that if you didn't mean it, you should apologize.

You apologized, but I had to tell you.

I woke up heartbroken.

The Fall Guy / Or, Why Isn't This a Billion Dollar Movie?

I watched the Fall Guy twice this weekend. Rare is the time that I see a movie on consecutive days (Pulp Fiction), or twice within a week (Everything Everywhere). The Fall Guy made me do it.

Yeah, I should have seen it earlier - I wanted to. But circumstances didn't quite work out.

But then I saw it, and as much as I loved it, I also was forced, sadly, to lament that it's maybe barely broken even at this point almost a month after its release. This should be a billion dollar movie, people. This is so much better than any Marvel movie since Iron Man. (And, probably better than Iron Man anyway.) Definitely better than any DC movie, period. Or any monsterverse movie (this does not count Godzilla Minus One, or Monarch the tv show - though again this is probably better than either of those, and make no mistake I loved both). Or anything that pushes CGI garbage, giving you the illusion that you're watching a live action film when really you're watching a hypnotoad cartoon.

Here is an incomplete list of reasons why this movie is amazing:

1a. Ryan Gosling - Baby Goose is in his best form since Nice Guys or Crazy Stupid Love (and also Drive, though he is much less intense here).

1b. Emily Blunt - talk about the perfect foil for the guy who has everything - she has everything too!

1ab. Ryan Gosling + Emily Blunt - this is very very believable onscreen chemistry and you root like hell for this couple to make it.

2. The love letter to practical stunts and the people who perform them - it's all just so impressive to watch this series of escalating dangerous situations, crafted solely for our benefit. Plus, there's a paragraph in the letter to stunt dogs and c'mon, this good boy kills it. (Incidentally, for a Canadian Baby Goose's French is not so hot.)

3. The love letter to movie making - it's two love letters, and one is to the actual movie making process. It's all so meta, with the talk of split screens and oners and all that, but then there's watching the team of cameras on all sorts of vehicles capturing the stunt vehicles and the stunties. It shows us what a director does, what a producer does, what on the fly script changes look like, all that stuff. It's very cool. It's not original, to show the show within (or around) a show, but it's fascinating and eminently watchable the way they present it. Also, see 1b.

4. It's very funny. I lol'ed multiple times. Overall it's just very, very entertaining.

There's other stuff as well: the rest of the cast (Winston Duke I see you), the soundtrack (so much KISS - but the real gem was the original Fall Guy theme in the credits).

I really cannot recommend it enough, and I really am sad that this didn't make a billion dollars. It's movies like this that deserve recognition so that more movies like this get made.

Please people, I implore you to go see this movie in the theatre if possible. THE FALL GUY!!

SHOGUN, people. SHOGUN!

 

Oh my god. Oh Portugese God. Oh friggin' god of all falcons, short and long winged.

I repeat: SHOGUN!

This show, in this era, in the last decade of the most decadent and beautiful and tragic and incredibly crafted and stacked with acting talent and imagination television. In and out of all of it, this show has risen, I believe, to claim the crown of best TV show ever.

And look, I'm not trying to dance around like a fool waving war fans made out of hot take clickbait (to my single digit readership) when I say this. It is not said lightly. Also, I recognize that I am caught in the afterglow of pillowing, having just finished the series last night - and maybe I'm about to be descended upon by shinobi wearing such flags as the Sopranos or Mad Men (in my mind they are probably wearing the Americans logo). But there is nothing, there is absolutely nothing about this show that does not rate below 10/10.

Here is a non-exhaustive list of things it 10s out of 10:

• Production values including costumes, sets, props etc
• All technical visual and audio stuff - it's beautifully presented, and the score is wonderfully contributory without being ostentatious
• The acting is off the charts
• The writing (dialog) is even further off the charts - which in and of itself is amazing, but when you consider that it was written in English, then Japanese, then C17 Japanese, then back to English for subtitles ... it blows my mind
• The writing (story) is intricate, so well thought out, it's tragic (like tears, man, prepare to shed some tears), it's at times funny, and in a nod to music, maybe (in particular jazz, Ryan Gosling), it's the words left unsaid that really throw the whole pile hurdling off a cliff to be battered by waves against jagged rocks until only the option of seppuku remains. I like this. I love shows that respect the audience to figure some shit out for themselves, because the echo of realization makes the impact earned and deeply resonant
• The actors are all amazing - yes Hiro Sanada, obviously, Anna Sawai (moment!!) and Cosmo Jarvis are all tremendous, like these are all Emmy performances; but then you get to the second level: Tadanobu Asano who plays Yabushinge, Takehiro Hira who plays Ishido are just two of multiple; and then you get to the third level: Moeka Hoshi who plays Fuji, and Hiroto Kanai who plays Omi, and the list goes on ... the height of skill and the depth that the talent reaches is amazing. And then when you consider all of these folks are native Japanese speakers (or if they're not, then holy moly extra kudos) and certainly not of the regular Hollywood circuit, well then ... simply, wow (incidentally, as we have moved into the Representation Era of Hollywood, we have seen the unearthing of some seriously amazing Asian talents)
• The little details such as letting Japanese people speak Japanese (I think this is the way it should be), or the slight deviations in translation from party to party (Mariko, you are the slyest of devils) - something that each speaker at one point or another worries about and sometimes directly confronts the translator over - all these details equal crazy levels of realism that enrich the show, like a 48 hour tonkotsu stock

Anyway, maybe I'll write a separate spoiler-y discussion post but for now I'm still reeling in the whole aftermath of it all (I watched episodes 9 and 10 last night) and my heart hurts. But, it is also overjoyed to have watched this series, and I had to say something. So if you haven't started it yet, friggin' go press play on Shogun already. And get ready, you shitbag barbarian, get ready for a journey for which you could never have prepared anyway.

2023 best tv shows I watched

Yeah this is late. This has been sitting in drafts since December. So sue me.

Here's my list of favourite shows from 2023. It may be incomplete because let's face it, there's a heck of a lot of tv shows released every year and since they're all streamed, I frankly can't remember when exactly they were released and/or concluded. Anyway.

The Bear - loved season 2. Loved it. I wrote a separate post about Syd's day off (with a narcissistic twist, natch), but the episodes on Marcus, on Richie, and on Christmas were all so incredibly good. Each one of those episodes is a triumph to be lauded, and they all happened in the same 10 episode season which is a capital A Achievement.

Party Down - loved season 3. Loved it. I was scared that I would miss Lizzy Caplan too much, because obviously Casey and Henry's chemistry is a huge part of what sold and drove the show previously. But you know what, Jennifer Garner is terrific and delightful. Plus I already loved Zoe Chao, and Tyrel Jackson Williams held up to the rest of them really well. He was LOL good! And also, the twist at the end made me ache and yearn for season 4, so well done there producers.

Blue Eye Samurai - love Maya Erskine so much. Love the animation style so much. It's one of the most beautiful, rich, striking, you name it - animated shows to look at, it and the Bad Batch. But the story is very good as well, engrossing, and the cast. But Maya Erskine man, she is on a heater.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters - speaking of heaters, Anna Sawai anyone?? Man alive, I watched Pachinko finally (not a 2023 show, more below) and noticed her for the first time in her small but impactful role. And then Monarch comes out, and while the main draw I would say is the Russells' casting (not quite Yellowjackets level of casting because obviously they're related - but pretty damn great), Anna Sawai is AWESOME. She's mesmerizing. But also, you know what, I was subjected to the Kong vs Godzilla trailer before a movie recently and holy moly, is this show ever NOT about that crap. It is, obviously, and it takes place in that universe (the movie universe is directly referenced in the show), but I don't think two properties out of the same family could be any different. I guess Marvel (Iron Man or Loki vs Falcon and Winter Soldier or whatever that last Ant Man thing was) or DC (any movie vs Poison Ivy or Peacemaker) stuff, where one thing is so good and one other thing is so bad. Note to studios: the character centric piece is always the good one, and the generic CGI garbage is the bad one.

The Last of Us - what else is there to say? The power of the Pedro. And yeah, I love seeing Melanie Lynskey pop up whenever and wherever she can. But Pedro, he's the man. And cannibals, I mean, are there ever worse villains than cannibals? The spore peeps aren't even really that bad, you just gotta play the quiet game! But cannibals, you know. No one wants to be eaten. But also Bella Ramsey - the mall episode was a great episode of tv. Anyway, don't be reduced to an ear on the floor, Bella Ramsey.

The Diplomat - I was unsure prior to watching this whether I'd like it. A dialog driven show about political horse-trading is not my usual go-to. But Keri Russell is stellar, as she was in the Americans - not the same, but similarly strong and compelling, and you want to root for her. And I did.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (plus honourable mention to Picard s3*) - Anson Mount's Captain Pike is, I think, the best captain since Picard - but the crew is the best crew since dare I say TOS? And the Spock and Nurse Chapel thing is electric! And the musical episode, I mean c'mon, I am an absolute sucker for musical episodes**. But mostly the Spock Chapel will they won't they, with wise old dad Captain Pike watching over them all. That's comfort, folks.

*Fan service done to perfection, is what Picard s3 was.

**It's really mostly Once More With Feeling, the Buffy musical episode.

Beef - some of my friends didn't love it, or even like it enough to finish it, which surprised me. Some loved it. I loved it. I loved Steven Yeun's impotent rage, which I guess I related to, certainly in my younger years. I loved when he went to church and fell awash to his emotions, which I could not relate to, though very much enjoyed watching play out, and empathized or maybe celebrated (the feelings, not the church). I loved the wild ride of it all, with all the shocking escalations right through to the trippy denoument. But mostly the impotent rage felt by these visible minorities, that drew me in.

Warrior - and the opposite, the potent rage of these Chinese immigrant BMFs. Wow. What a way to go out! Yes I'm sad they had to end their run, damn you low ratings. But the production value and the stories of despair from both from the Chinese and Irish factions, the people being trod upon, and the father son story, and the blood vs found family story (stories?), Chao's story!, hell the whole southern side trip with Chao and Lee, and the Hong and the lounge singer story too. Strong exit, my brothers. Sad to see you go, but what a mark you left.

Honourable mentions: Silo, Scavengers Reign (what an imagination), Pachinko (yes this was from 2022 and should have been on that list, I didn't get around to watching it until this year - and it is indeed phenomenal), Poker Face, Jury Duty (just, I mean, Ron Gladden was caught on camera being a damned saint, is really the only reason why), Midnight Mass (also from yesteryear (2021), but everyone was clamouring about House of Usher and I watched it, and frankly it was meh - but seeking out answers as to why Mike Flanagan was so popular, a friend suggested I watch Midnight Mass which was his favourite, so I did, and I loved it), Barry, Fargo (solid season thanks to Juno Temple and also the friggin sin eater).

Shows others loved but I thought let's just be friends: Dead Ringers (I have a real problem watching shows where everyone is detestable), I'm a Virgo.

Special mentions: Yellowjackets - man alive I wanted to like s2 more but I guess it's just real hard to follow up such a phenomenal debut season. Same goes for Our Flag Means Death.

I still haven't watched Reservation Dogs yet, which I know is a mistake. I also haven't watched Succession, but much like Game of Thrones, I probably never will.

2024 is already shaping up to be very solid (SHOGUN!! with Anna Sawai!!), so stay tuned when I release that list in July 2025.

More Civil War chat

I was reading an article on an entertainment website about Unfrosted, the Jerry Seinfeld Pop-Tart movie, and I made the mistake of clicking on another article about Civil War, and how Alex Garland really made a fatal slash unforgivable mistake of not picking a side. And I can't believe people are still up in arms about this, writing new articles about this, for multiple reasons.

a. has this critic not already decided who should have been labeled as good and who was bad (the answer is, they have), and if so, why do they need straight up exposition on this?

And b. what is this gross self-righteousness to say the film is diminished or even ruined (?!) because they weren't told who is good and who is bad, because clearly the bad guys are the bad guys and you are gutless if you can't say who the bad guys are,

And c. if you're so blinded to the message, the beauty or the achievement of the movie because of the lack of political labeling, then you should not be a movie critic,

And d. e. f. and fucking z. already. Z. being shut up.

If your view is this could have been a great movie, if only Alex Garland put red or blue patches on the soldiers, but since he did not it's garbage, you need to shut up.

As I said, my mistake for clicking on the article. Please, people, don't click on any more articles about Civil War. But do see the movie, because it's amazing.

Niners draft ... Ricky Pearsall ... ?

I'm not really too into criticizing Shanny and Lynch's draft picks, or really most of the NFL GMs. This is because I have a fraction of a fraction of a percentage of the time and resources they have in scouting and researching these kids in college.

Sometimes though, I am admittedly confused by a pick (Solomon Thomas). Sometimes it's obvious and no questions need to be asked (Nick Bosa), and sometimes it turns out to be a fantastic if somewhat surprising pick (Brandon Aiyuk, in one of their best trade ups ever).

We all know they like to take swings on WR (Pettis, Hurd, Danny Grey) and they sure like to take special teamers early. But for the most part, they know more than I do so I watch and I speculate and sometimes I cheer and sometimes I scratch my head.

So the selection of Ricky Pearsall was surprising because a. no one projected him as a first round pick - if the mock was a WR at 31, it tended to be Ladd McConkley - and b. with all the BA and to a lesser extent Deebo trade talk, this obviously only heated all that BS up. (Please don't trade them, guys.)

My best guess is they keep BA and Deebo, and Shanny, ever the innovator, wants to run 4 WR sets this season - with Jauan as the 4th, and with Kittle at right side TE. He can line Deebo up in the backfield too, or he can replace Deebo with CMC. I think this would truly strike fear into opposing defenses, depending on how deep and how talented in coverage their safeties and linebackers are.

Now, they could have already done this formation with CMC in the backfield, BA and Jauan out wide and Deebo in the slot (or JJ in the slot and Deebo out wide). Technically. Which means they see something in Pearsall's slot skills that already surpasses what we have on the team already. A lot of analysts list route running as Ricky's biggest asset, along with sure hands.

Well let's hope so, Niners fans. Cause I sure as heck wanted a tackle in the first round. (I know the best prospects were already taken, but a guy like Kingsley Suamataia for example, I've read about, and I don't think he's gonna fall to 63.)

One thing Lynch has is nine remaining picks, and we probably don't need all of those, so I'm still hoping for a Day 2 trade up. Maybe we can still snatch a solid OT prospect (Suamataia, or there is a bit of Roger Rosengarten buzz), or a CB like Cooper DeJean or Rakestraw. Actually at this point a trade up for a solid CB prospect would be great, then maybe we can snag a project like Rosengarten in round 3. But I mean, we can't actually rely on Shanny and Lynch's late round magic every year. Can we??